Sunday, December 04, 2005

white elephant

so, i like being with friends & family during the holidays. if you don't remember, go back and read the post about thanksgiving with friends.

the other night, some of our friends brought up the idea of a white elephant gift exchange. you know, give someone a gift that costs less than $5, in a random exchange.

so, i've been thinking if i want to participate. and i've decided. i don't. but i might. here's my question, why should we exchange a cheap gift? is it so we feel like we're giving something to each other but can't afford to buy good gifts? or can't afford to buy gifts for everyone? or don't want to feel awkward about giving a gift to someone but not others?

i'm not ripping on the suggestion, i'm just trying to understand why we'd do it. i know, it's sorta fun to stick someone with an odd gift that you picked up for cheap. but then again, i don't know if i want to keep that junk either.

really, i just want to enjoy your company. why don't we all buy a bottle of wine that costs around $5, and we'll spend time opening those?

11 comments:

Adam said...

Good questions Ed. I've never been opposed to gift exchanges, but I've never really favored the inexpensive route.

Here's my opinion. One can actually buy very nice, thoughtful gifts for 5 or 10 dollars. And you can buy crap. And this is where disparity runs rampant. I don't know how often I've seen someone spend time and effort trying to buy a nice exchange gift only to be rewarded with a stupid joke gift. It's very unfortunate. I think that drawing names is a much better alternative to the random exchange and answer to your question about feeling "awkward about giving a gift to someone but not others." Make it a 10 or 15 limit, draw names, and everyone gets one thoughtful gift. I really don't like joke gifts anyway. You've spent money, time, effort on something we can chuckle about for a minute and toss in the garbage later on.

I like your wine idea too, but that's a lot of wine.

edluv said...

are you saying that we couldn't take care of that amount.

come on!

here's the other question i've always had: should white elephant be bad? i used to think, no, it should be a nice, inexpensive gift. but then, i was learning the fable of the white elephant. so, basically, the idea is for a worthless thing.

i also share the frustration of trying to find something nice, something cheap, and then you get stuck with a broken vcr or some other crap you don't want. ha ha, he got a box of feminine hygene product. ha ha. ugh, thanks but no thanks. wait, just no thanks.

so, how do i offer my suggestion without being a jerk or whatever because i don't think the current idea is a good one? it's not personal, or anything weird like that. i'd just rather not take part in that. i suppose that i could just respectfully decline to take part but not stop anyone from doing what they want.

and to avoid the awkward, i didn't get you a gift, i still don't want to give or get gifts from friends. not that i'm too good to accept them from you people, just that it's easier to do the everyone thing.

Adam said...

Well, I don't find it offensive for you to just tell people you're not into the gift giving. It's definitely not an obligation. I would hope you wouldn't lose any friends over it. We should probably figure it out soon though, or we'll be designing policy for next season.

Anonymous said...

I have to say that I have had a lot of fun with the white elephant deal. Of course when we do it at Youth I add some good gifts to the pile of silly and the kids have the motivation of sily fun gifts and some fun gifts that are not junk. On the other hand with friends and family real gift sharing is so much nicer, except that there are always those folks that buy crap and don't put a thought into it. As far as the wine idea. Bring it on! I like that idea.

timidvenus said...

well, i think it all sounds like fun..feminine hygene, wine, elephants, etc...i just hope that whetever the deal, i'm there... maybe 1/2 could bring wine, 1/2 could bring food... or even a fun game to take up some of the time previously devoted to gift exchanging...pictionary, anyone??

Justin said...

A couple thoughts about the wine. It is possible to get a decent bottle for $5, but I think holiday get togethers are a fun time to splurg, and by not buying gifts it means more money for wine. I would suggest a holiday wine tasting party, with a couple bottles of high quality, maybe compared to the charles shaw so we can taste the difference. I agree with the no gift thing. I wish I had discussed it with the family. I much prefer the idea of using the money to go out for a fantastic dinner, or go on a family trip, or something else that is about being together rather than give and get.

Justin said...

A couple thoughts about the wine. It is possible to get a decent bottle for $5, but I think holiday get togethers are a fun time to splurg, and by not buying gifts it means more money for wine. I would suggest a holiday wine tasting party, with a couple bottles of high quality, maybe compared to the charles shaw so we can taste the difference. I agree with the no gift thing. I wish I had discussed it with the family. I much prefer the idea of using the money to go out for a fantastic dinner, or go on a family trip, or something else that is about being together rather than give and get.

Adam said...

Only if we can cover up the names of the wines and do double blind taste tests. That's the only way to accurately tell. Ha ha.

edluv said...

justin cared so much he posted twice

timidvenus said...

i have about 8 of those fabric things used as fancy gift bags for wine-giving that would work perfectly to cover up the labels (and double as drip-catchers).

edluv said...

i think i see a plan coming into action