the customer is not always right

i've never worked in retail, but i get plenty frustrated with people in lines at stores. i can only imagine how bad it must be to put up with people. not that every clerk is always happy, pleasant, or anything else, but man, i don't know what i'd do if i had to put up with some of the customers on this website. it's no failblog, but it's pretty funny.

here's a little sample:
(A man walks up to our hot case with his wife and two little girls.)

Me: “Hi! How may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi - we wanted to get some chicken strips.”

(As I am taking his order, I notice his daughters licking the hot case glass.)

Me: “Excuse me sir, but your daughters are licking the glass.”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “Well…aside from the fact that the glass is hot, we cleaned it this morning with a chemical cleaner to wash off a layer of grease build-up.”

Customer: “So?”

Me: “The chemical we used is a known carcinogen. I might suggest that you stop your daughters from ingesting it.”

Customer: “Look, lady. You’ve obviously never been a parent. When you have kids, you’ll learn that it’s MUCH easier to just let your kids do whatever they want.”




or how about this gem:

(Our credit card machine went down, and we started to make signs for the doors alerting the customers to this. Before the signs were up, I had to ring up a customer’s order.)

Me: “The total is ****. I’m sorry; our credit card machine is down.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t see any signs!”

Me: “The machine just broke five minutes ago while you were still in line. I was just telling my coworker to make signs a moment ago….”

Customer: “I don’t have enough cash. How about debit?”

Me: “Well, debit would use the same machine as the credit cards, but either way our store does not accept debit. Just cash today.”

Customer: “How about a check?”

Me: “Sorry, no personal checks. Just cash today.”

Customer: *getting upset now* “Well, what do you expect me to do?”

Me: “The last customer went next door to use the ATM to get cash.”

Customer: “You’re being extremely rude, you know!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m just trying to explain to you that the credit card machine is down.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t listen!”

Me: “…”